I'm still here.

It's obvious that I have no idea what I am doing...trying to manage two blogs means I suddenly just don't blog altogether. But neither does Megan so I guess it's just, whatever.

So, I got myself a pinterest account about three months ago and I just discovered what it even is about three weeks ago. This could explain why I no longer blog..or do the dishes. The humor section is down right now so...that's how I ended up here.

I guess I should specify that there is another reason I have stopped doing dishes: tupperware. My brother has been staying with us this month and between him and Jesse, the sink is always full of oatmeal caked tupperware. So over the last few weeks I have become completely numb to dishes and they now just hand wash their own. We do have a dishwasher, mind you, and today I realized that the dishes on the top shelf were clean and the ones on the bottom were dirty. I did nothing about it and told no one.

I also started a new job last Monday. It's been awesome. The other day my boss(es) were talking about dress codes and cracking jokes about how weird it would be to have one and wondering if you're even allowed to make people dress a certain way (this was brought up because they want me to get Boise State apparel and weren't sure if they could make it mandatory). I also feel the need to talk about how many times they have taken me to lunch and about the one time they took me to get lunch then we ate it in the "lounge" area..I dunno it's kinda like a family room? and we watched The Walking Dead. I think all employers could get some pointers from these guys. Work gets done too, it's totally crazy.

And lastly, Jesse made a deal with the devil and I'm not sure he realizes exactly what he committed to.

But it was real so...come next Spring (maybe early summer) we will have a new addition to our family...


He will be black and white and his name will be Tobi.

Interviews

Lately I have been finding myself in many office buildings talking to people that are there watching and analyzing my every move.

The first interview (I havent had a real interview since 2005, mind you) I left feeling pretty inadequate and thinking "so that's how those things go", I knew I didn't get it but I didn't think it was THAT bad. It wasnt like, a horrible interview but I could have been much more prepared to answer the "about me" portion of it.

The next few were good but with the lack of phone calls back my self esteem has dwindled some.

But this last interview was the icing on the cake.

The first question (or phrase I guess..) was: So, tell me a little about yourself.

Ok. What do you want to know? How deep do I need to get into this? Because right now the things that I could tell are fairly obvious...I have brown hair...I'm 5'6...my car needs to be washed really bad? So I just settle for "well I just got married a few weeks ago". Usually that one opens up a conversation but apparently not with this guy.

On to the next question

How do you do with criticism?

I love it. I soak it in and change myself every time someone tells me that what I have done is incorrect. How do I honestly admit that it depends if I think they are right or not? Because some criticism is constructive and some is just not. So I just went with "if it's constructive then I do fine" but really I go home and dwell on it for the next 3 weeks.

What would you say is your biggest accomplishment?

Um...Well I hate to reiterate that I just got married. It's not that Im trying to bring this up over and over again but for now it kind of is my only accomplishment...between that and graduating high school 4 years ago. Should I throw in that it was in the temple? Because depending on your religion you could understand that it's an accomplishment.

What would you say is your biggest failure?

Uh...um...this interview? The skills test I took right before you brought me in here..the one asked me which shapes were different than the others because I still think it was a trick question?

Then he proceeds to tell me these two specific things:

There is a strict dress code. Violate the dress code three times and you will be terminated.

There is a strict rule of being on time. Be late three times and you will be terminated.

Awesome. I already know you aren't going to hire me...which is kind of a relief for both of us because it means you can't fire me later.

It has arrived

jesseandamber11.blogspot.com Please enjoy. And read it.

Serious Question

Recently my equally as good half happened to mention that I have a lot of posts on here that are along the lines of spring flings, theories that are lies, and a lot of other posts that made me wince a little when I read them (oh 2009, how I do not miss you).

So here is the debate- do I start a new blog, after I wed, that's more of an "us" blog and let this one go or do I keep this one and just revamp it?

I cannot decide and it is driving me crazy.

Multiple Personalities

Out in the midwest (maybe not all the midwest..but maybe) it's challenging to find people that share the same....sense of humor as the rest of the world. I don't know how else to put that. It's not that they don't have one but it's that there's is only funny to them. So when you meet someone that totally gets you, it's awesome!

I am walking in the direction of a guy (probably 65+) at the gym-

guy: *whispers something*
Me: *look at guy*
guy: *looks back, sheepishly*...."sorry, sometimes I talk to myself...actually all the time..."
Me: "oh yeah, I do it all the time, too"
guy: *starts walking away then pauses and looks at me* "Ya know I really have the best conversations when I do! It's the best. And you never get in an argument!"

I love it when I can relate.

I have met my match

I am waiving my "no gushing" clause for the next few minutes. Please bare with me.

I could name a million reasons as to why I am so lucky to have ever met Jesse, I don't even know where to start. Our relationship is hard to explain because I don't know how to talk about how perfect it is without sounding like I'm exaggerating. I know there aren't soul mates in the world but I also know that he is the best possible man I could have ever met. He brought everything to the table that I ever could have asked for in a guy.

I remember thinking about Jesse after our first few dates and getting very frustrated because I couldn't tell what the feelings were that I had. It was a feeling where I could look at him and never find fault and I could talk to him and never find anything annoying about the conversation or wish that I was having the conversation with someone else. I just loved his presence and the way I felt when he would drop me off at home, it was like part of me slowly began feeling complete and the time we spent together was so...wholesome.

I fell in love with all the dumb little things and it was all part of the process of falling in love with him completely; like when I first saw his tattoos at a church ball game and when we went and played a game of horse at my work after we made dinner together. I remember the first time we met and he started scratching my back and I told him he was my new best friend but what I wanted to say was "please marry me"....but it was a little soon. I look back to the very beginning and I think about how precisely everything happened and how it had to happen that way in order for us to be where we are today.

Jesse had to have had a script on how to date me. Everything we did was on his terms and his agenda but he still somehow made it all about me and made me feel like I was the only person that mattered. I know that is something he will do throughout our entire life and it is one of the things I love the most about him, that things will be on his terms and I am along for the ride as his support system and there is never a point in time where I will go unloved or unheard. The best way he put it was when he said that he is the boss, but I am Mrs. boss.

I am so grateful to have Jesse in my life. I am grateful for the times where we have laughed our butts off over something that happened at 1 in the morning and we were so tired that it truly is the funniest thing or when he doesn't know how to book a flight correctly..and he does not think it is as funny as I do but he still lets me laugh anyway. I am so grateful for the cards he randomly sends me and for the time we went to the temple and just sat outside of it while we talked about the day we get to go inside of it. I am grateful for his testimony and that he is the one to take me to the temple. I am grateful that he has all the backbone in the world and that he is strong and when he makes a decision he doesn't change his mind. I am grateful that he made the decision to ask me on a date 5 1/2 months ago and that he made the decision to let it progress and asked me to marry him a week ago.

(not his baby ps)

I am grateful for everything that he has done in his life that led him to where he is and made him the person that I would fall totally and completely in love with.

......there is a pulse

Summer so far summer has been nothing short of awesome. I know that only three people read this but I do feel like I have a little bit betrayed my blends.

Last week I was able to make a last minute trip out to Canada to see my mom's side of the family. It was great to spend time with my cousins (mainly just Kiki and Rob). In the town that my mom grew up in they always do a parade on the 1st of July (Canada's independance day) and then have a rodeo. Before the rodeo there is always a family barbecue and I wish I had snapped some photos of that just you could be more entertained. On our way back from Canada Tyler, Katy, Reagan, and I took the scenic route and went to Mt. Rushmore and bear country. Anyway, summer has been amazing so far but none of my pictures are sending (and my sister never sent me the other ones ehem) so this blog just became 85% less exciting that I had anticipated.


In the mean time I am going to pick up my beloved from the airport. Stay tuned for the next post...I have anxious butterflies just thinking about it, really.